The PottEvaners Affair
by filthyfigments
Summary: James hates Lily and vice versa. However, Lily likes Sirius, who likes James' girlfriend, who likes Remus, who likes Sirius' girlfriend, who likes James, who secretly likes Lily & is jealous of Sirius. JL Full summary inside.


"Lilykins, come now, get into the car!" my father's loud, booming voice echoed off the yellow-wallpapered walls of our home. I sighed and quickly stuffed my favorite summer letter from my best friends, Helena & Angela, into my skirt pocket. I looked at my ratty old trunk and made a mental note to repair it magically at Hogwarts. I looked around my spacious sky-blue room and silently whispered goodbye; this was my sixth year of going to Hogwarts, and I loved every single moment of it. The neat bookshelves arranged in size and shape; the vanity desk/mirror where I had been applying small amounts of lipgloss since fifth grade; the colorful bedspread and mismatching pillow cases; it was almost too cute to leave, but if you had the chance to go to Hogwarts like I did, you'd be out of here quicker than one can say ym sister's name, _Petunia Elizabeth Evans! _But I wasn't leaving for Hogwarts TODAY. No, I was leaving for this end of the summer party at the devil's house -Potter-. After many letters, beggings, pleadings and threats from my friends, they somehow persuaded me to go to his bloody home and 'party' and then stay at their own home for the remaining three days.

"Coming dad! Just a sec!" I hollered back and snapped the lid of my trunk on. I struggled to lift the heavy trunk (filled with books of course, you idiot) out of my bedroom doorway. Huffing and panting, I managed to yank it out with a pathetic strength. _WHAM! _All my things which I laboriously and neatly packed, flew out of my trunk, again. _Damnit all!_

"Move it loser! You're so pathetic!" my older sister by two years, Petunia (speak of the devil), shoved pass me and pranced down the stairs, putting on large masses of eye make-up to an amount that would be considered slutty. I bit in a sigh; Petunia was never like this before I received my Hogwarts letter, but she stopped being a real sister after this however. But this sad fact didn't stop me from snapping an incensed remark to her every now and then.I stuffed in all my clothes for the second time again this morning, not even stopping to fold them; my father had a loud and boisterous temper, and he knew how to use it.I managed to pull my trunk and my own living ass down our tiny hallway and out the door in record time. _Whew! _

When I came to our spacious kitchen, my father was waiting there, _for me._ Don't get me wrong, I love my father very much and vice versa, but he's very impatient and hot-tempered, like me. "Here Lilykins, I'll get that for you" he told me, with a knowing smile and wink. He single-handedly carried my trunk out the door and into the car; _stupid male strength... _I crawled into our little sky blue car and slid into the passenger seat, taking up all the space.

"Lily, please leave a space for Petunia" my mother, Violet Evans, told me with a reproving half-smile. "You're father wants to talk to you; he says it's very important!" she winked. Then, as if on que, father and Petunia, stepped into the car. Petunia, as if she just saw me, glanced at me and scooted over to the other side of the car. I glared at her, and she mouthed the words, _Spoiled brat, _at me. I mouthed, _slutty bitch, _back. More glares, and more mouthing of the profanity, that is, until my father looked in the rearview mirror at me and began to speak.

"Lily, I know you're a young 16 year old lady now, but I want you know that-" sniff, sniff- "your mother and I are-" more sniffles and an extremely _un_surprising suck-up act of offering a tissue to my mother from Petunia, " VERY proud of you, and that since you're blossoming into a lovely flower, that-" my father stopped abruptly and blew into the flimsy little tissue Petunia offered "that you should be carefiul this year, since there are many men out there and..." my father cautioned me, still sniffling and trying in vain to stop these un-manly tears. I froze, shocked and, well, shocked. Here I was, sixteen for goodness sake, and NOW my parents were giving my THE talk? What the hell?! And now Petunia's smirking again, the retarded slut.

I vaguely wondered if my best friends, Angela and Helena McGovern (They happen to be twins!) had the same problems as I did; probably not, since their mother and father were highly sucessful and rich pureblood Aurors, but they weren't spoiled and bratty as everyone thought they were... that much anyway. I tried to smooth out my rumpled skirt but my fingers traced the problem; the letter from the twins! I quickly pulled it out and held it at an angle so Petunia the slut wouldn't see.

_Dear Lilykins,_

_How are you? Are you holding up alright? How's your family, and most of all, slutty old Petunia? She still bitching about you being a witch? If she does...well, you just tell us. So where'd you go this summer? We went to America, or, as they call it there, the United States of America. Anyway, we're in this FITTING ROOM RIGHT NOW FOR MERLIN'S SAKE because Angie's trying on about 50 different dresses (35 of which she'll probably never wear, mind you) and I'm just about bored off my little ass, so I'm using a Quik-Quills quill, as to save cramps and ink splatters. But I'd better not scream into the parchment as loud anymore; Angie keeps giving me filthy glares and people are starting to knock on the bloody door in wonder. And don't even think of smirking and laughing at unfortunate little me like you always do, Lilykins! _

I smirked when I read the last line; it was good to know that my friends knew me so well.

**Fine, I'll do the talking now since you're sooooo bored Helena, and you keep whining for Merlin's sake! SO... have you received any letters from James **(I glared fiercely at the part where HIS name was)** and the Marauders this summer Lils? Anything from the GORGEOUS, SEXY, DASHING SIRIUS BLACK Lilykins? (laughter) **

I blushed furiously, because both of them knew I had a HUGE crush on Sirius Black, even though he's Potter's best friend and they're the same on the inside but with one difference: Sirius is better looking. Wait, did I just say BETTER looking? Does that mean I think Potter is hott, but Black is hotter?! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME?!!!

**Remember last year, when Potter kept asking you out? (more laughter) And when you kept turning him down? Why don't you just say yes to get him to stop bothering you if it's so annoying and such, Lily? You're not very brilliant at these things you know...**

_Oh shut up Angela, don't be an idiot; Lily's just got some... problems with males and their anatomy and how to deal wit' them, that's all! Anyway, did you receive an invitation to Potter's end-of-the-summer bash on the 25th? Both of us are going, and you should too! Everyone else in the up-coming sixth year is, so you should too, regardless of Potter and his gang! That's why we're cramped in this retarded room trying on flimsy dresses... No, you already wore the blue one Angie! The OTHER one! NO, THE OTHER ONE!! THE ONE AT YOUR BLOODY HAND YOU IDIOT!_

**(Fake gasp) Did you just call me an idiot!?**

_Yes, why yes I did._

**You are such a bitch Helena!**

_And you are a filthy whore dear sister, but we've got to say goodbye to Lily now..._

**Oh, right... Hehehe, sorry Lils.**

**_BYE LILYKINS! SEE YOU AT POTTER'S PARTY!_**

_From your best gals,_

**Angela & **_Helena _

I silently laughed, and carefully tucked the letter back into my denim pocket and glanced out the window. The grassy hills and fresh countryside greeted my eyes. I laid my head against my seatbelt and dreamt of pleasant things...like me and Sirius Black holding hands, on a balcony overlooking lovely sunset, on a date, kissing me with passion...

* * *

Splendid, my first chappie is done! This is my first fic ever, so be kind and no flaming thanks. Review please!! D 

- Black Heart Broken Rose

Okay, so Lily and James hate each other, but they like each other's friends...in more ways than one. giggles More like friends with benefits...


End file.
